still felt

i felt cheated, robbed. I still do.
of a stolen future.
of time spent with you.
of you teaching me thing.
of making memories and possibilities.
of playing that game we used to play.
of burying you in the sand of distant beaches.
of you seeing me on my special day.
of football-related tantrums.
of growing old.
of your reassurance and love.
agony at the fact that you never wanted to leave.
weeks blur, hours smear, days turn.
sometimes i like to close my eyes and stare into the dark.
that is when i feel you most.
gone, gone, gone; like fire under the tempest of hearts carved from ice.
it withers and dies.
just like you.
just like me.

- always always R.